I Will Try to Fix You

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

~ Coldplay, "Fix You"~

Today I went to my mom's house to pick up some things I'd left there and gradually try to chip away at the clutter that accumulated in my bedroom there over the better portion of my life. When I was there I came across some letters from an old friend that I'd received in my early teen years and I became completely overwhelmed with a feeling of time passed...in that moment I remembered so clearly the person that I was then and how dramatically different I am now. It blows my mind.

It made me think of all the beautiful and painful things that have formed who I am today...all the things I thought I'd never let go of or never get over that, in time, I was indeed able to leave in my past and move on to a surely better and brighter future.

And as I was listening to the song mentioned above while I drove home I felt sort of a bursting in my heart that I can't quite explain. I felt a new resolution to continue to grow from the mistakes of my more recent past and allow those mistakes to, in fact, be in the past and not so much a part of the present. Each passing moment presents the opportunity to embrace life in a new and different way...shaking free the weight on my shoulders that I choose to carry around, if only for the moment, and then choosing to take a route of optimism and growth. Yea, sure...adolescence is a time of dramatic change and development...but for me at least, I don't think it ever stopped. Self discovery continues on.

That was my 4th of July weekend epiphany. A little sunshine can do WONDERS for the optimist in me. :)